This is another story – another journey of faith and trust.

Since I have become a Christian, I have gone through many trials and tests and this is one of those that I would hope can encourage you in your own walk. (If you have been a Christian long enough you will learn that trials and tests are actually a good thing and good for us, and you if you have not – then I suggest that you get working on that ).

It was around the year 1995.  My children were around the ages of 8 and 10.  I was going through a real financially difficult time. Yet I believed and trusted the Lord, for the scriptures say that He will provide for my needs and not to fret or worry.  And so I didn’t.

The time has come that all that was left in my cupboards was rice and spices. So we had rice for breakfast, rice for lunch and rice for supper. It is totally amazing how many different ways you can cook rice, adding different spices – even butter and sugar for the morning rice .

I have decided to use this experience as a lesson to myself and my children. So instead of worrying, I encouraged them to be thankful to the Lord for providing for us and for seeing how much more we had than so many other people around the world. Each time we had our rice meal, we thanked the Lord and prayed for the homeless, for the hungry and thirsty people.  As we did this, we realized that we had so much given to us – and that in fact we were not ‘poor’ – not by other parts of the world’s standard.

Each day, I still kept trusting the Lord, not worrying – I knew that He will take care of us and that He is in control.

Week one went by and I still had no idea how our situation could change for better and so I kept on praying and believing.  When I saw that the children started to be worried and discouraged, I would try even harder to point out those who were in much worse place.  I have told them: ‘We are not poor, we have a roof over our head, we have beds to sleep in, we have clothes to wear and shoes on our feet, we are not cold, we even have TV and radio, and we are not hungry nor thirsty!’

Two weeks went by and the rice was starting to run low.  Yes, we had lots to start with since I used to buy bulk, but when you eat it three times a day, you will eventually see the bottom of the ‘barrel’. Most of the spices, butter, and sugar were gone now and so the meals were getting even more plainer.  And I started to feel fear creeping in.  So I continued to pray and hold close to the scriptures that soothed my soul – God’s Promises.

Three weeks went by and I was struck by a real fear.  ‘Oh Lord – how am I going to feed my children? The rice is almost gone.  Oh Lord, help me not to fear, help me to trust you still…no matter how bad things look.’ I felt this almost sick feeling in my gut – I was overtaken by fear.  When I opened the Bible, it opened to Isaiah 41:9-10:

I took you from the ends of the earth,
 from its farthest corners I called you.
 I said, ‘You are my servant’;
 I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. 
I will strengthen you and help you;
 I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

There it was again – the same scripture I have marked when I was saved.  As I was reading it though, I realized that I really didn’t know the meaning of the word ‘dismayed’.  I wanted to look it up to understand the scripture even more.

dismayed

1 : to cause to lose courage or resolution (as because of alarm or fear) <must not let ourselves be dismayed by the task before us>

Oh yes, that is exactly what I was going through but the scripture say ‘not to be dismayed’  – because He is my God and that He will help me.  The words sunk deep into my heart and shot like an arrow through my soul and then as I fell before the Lord, surrendering my situation to Him, the fear has left and His Peace filled me through and through.

The next day….there on the deck were boxes filled with food. I cannot remember how many boxes, but I remember the love we felt at that moment. It was so sweet and humbling and it all came at a perfect time – God’s Time.

That same day, we picked up a hitchhiker (okay in those days and where we lived it was not so strange to do). An older lady which didn’t say much. We dropped her off at her place and continued on home – after all we had much to be excited about.  I was going to cook a full meal – with potatoes .

Suddenly as clear as anything the Lord had spoken to me (no it was not an audible voice – but if you ever heard from the Lord then you know what I mean, otherwise I don’t think it can be explained). And He told me to go back to the lady that we just dropped off and prepare her a box of food from what we have received. Bring it to her and say to her: ‘I am here to tell you that Jesus loves you and He has not forgotten about you.’

Huh? What? The Lord wanted me to go to a stranger and say that? Okay, I can give her food – that I have no problem with, but to say anything else….???? Oh this was hard, but I knew better than not doing what the Lord has instructed and especially after the three weeks of my faith being tested.

So we packed a big box of food, which was so exciting and the amazing thing was that we still had so much more of it left. As we were driving to her place, I kept trying to rehears in my head how I would say it (you know I had this fear of being ridiculed for my faith). I walked down the stairs to her basement apartment and shyly knocked on her door. My heart was pounding but I was going to do exactly what the Lord asked me to do no matter what took place.

As she opened the door and looked at me a bit puzzled I started to say: ‘Hi, it’s me again. I am not sure what you believe, but I believe in Jesus, and I am here to tell you…………….’

The most amazing thing happened at this point. The little tiny petite lady under 5′ tall (I am 5’9”) leaped around my throat, started to cry and said: ‘Jesus loves me and He didn’t forget about me, Jesus didn’t forget about me, Thank You Jesus You didn’t forget about me.’

Well as you can imagine I was speechless, but the lady was not. She shared with me her story of how she walked away from following the Lord and now many years later was in much trouble. She started to pray again and asked God to forgive her, but felt that by now He has forgotten her.

Wow – all things work out for good for those who love him.

I often look back on this account with Jesus and remind myself to not fret, to not worry, to not be dismayed.  He is faithful!

PS. When my children speak of this time – they seem to think we were eating rice for three months instead of three weeks